I’ve kept a journal, on-and-off for as long as I can remember. And now that I’m married, I’ve found that it is extremely beneficial. It’s helped me to have a record of my trouble spots and a place where I can sort things out in my head without troubling my wife. That’s not to say that I use it to keep secrets from her. It’s on my computer in an easy to find location and she has access to everything that is on it.
If you’ve thought about starting one but are still on the fence, here are five reasons in favor of it.
- A history or events: In your journal can go records of big events. Write down big events as you remember them (like your first date, trips that you’ve taken together, etc.). Then, when you’re getting to an anniversary but are stuck for ideas, you can gift your wife with a trip down memory lane.
- A record of everything she says: This is the place to write down every little detail that might be even vaguely significant. Her favorite color, flower, dress style and size(for surprising her with a dress for a very special date)… everything that you feel it would be a good idea to remember goes into that journal.
- Your story made readable: Your journal contains words and those words tell a story. Specifically, they can tell the story of you and your wife and it does so continually. Having a record of your love story can help in those times when you can forget what brought you together in the first place.
- A chance to see growth: Let’s face it, when we’re going through something, we don’t have a clue how it is affecting and changing us for better or worse. When you’ve written things down and have a chance to look back at how you reacted to certain things, you are able to see what you need to change or what you’ve already changed.
- An outlet for frustration: When stress and frustration and all manner of vexations seem to target you constantly, a journal can provide you a means of getting all of those feelings down on paper so that you don’t have to feel them anymore. This helps you to avoid locking up or completely breaking down. You need to be the rock in your marriage and you can’t do that when stress has you in pieces.
You don’t have to be a good writer to keep a journal. In fact, you don’t really have to be a writer at all. Just write things down as you think of them, like taking notes. Find a method that suits you. Start a Word document or write in a composition notebook. It doesn’t have to be fancy, the point is that you write in it and write in it regularly.
Photo by See-ming Lee
